Jeanie Buss to Pelinka: “When I said we were ‘too thin’ at small forward, I didn’t mean to sign Jared Dudley”

by admin May 3, 2020

Lakers

Jeanie Buss to Pelinka: “When I said we were ‘too thin’ at small forward, I didn’t mean to sign Jared Dudley”

A heated exchange between Jeanie Buss and Rob Pelinka has surfaced and it involves former Bobcats star Jared Dudley. A source in Lakers management is claiming a furious Buss yelled to a trembling Pelinka, “When I said we were ‘too thin’ at small forward, I didn’t mean to sign Jared freaking Dudley!” In fairness to Pelinka, last spring was a tense one within the organization. Magic Johnson had quit unexpectedly, the team ...

by admin April 26, 2020

Utah Sports Fans Thrilled To Watch 10-Hour Documentary On Jazz Failure

The great people of Utah are used to being showered with blessings. And as they tune in to ESPN’s 10-hour documentary on the Jazz losing the 1998 NBA Finals, they can add another blessing to the pile. “My friends and family have been so eager to bring back Jazz basketball when we heard there was a huge NBA show on Sunday I had just one question: Are our beloved Utah Jazz ...

by admin March 5, 2020

Officiating , Rockets

James Harden Walking Out of Store With New Ball Deemed to Actually be Legal Dribble

Controversial footage of James Harden casually walking out a Dick’s Sporting Goods holding a new basketball has caused quite a stir among basketball fans. In the clip, Harden looks to clearly take 41 steps on his way to his vehicle. But, upon closer look, experts say the Rocket’s star may have actually pulled off a legal dribble. “Ok, here’s the footage that everyone’s arguing about. What do you think?” Coach Nick of BBall Breakdown asked former ...

by admin March 1, 2020

NBA News , Old School , Rockets , Teams

Report: China Has Been Altering All NBA Games So Yao Ming Drills Game-Winning 3-Pointer

It has been learned that China has been doctoring the end of all close NBA games to feature Yao Ming drilling game-winning three-pointers. The discovery was made when a Chinese security glitch leaked an on-line highlight from a Pistons/Suns game. In the actual game, Detroit won 113 – 111. However, the altered footage shows Yao Ming gathering a loose ball, rising up from thirty feet and swishing a three-pointer at the buzzer. Once the footage began ...

by admin January 18, 2020

Blazers , Bucks , Knicks , NBA News

Strict New Anti-Tampering Rule Would Strip Team of First Round Pick, Plumlee Brother

As offseason player movement becomes more frenetic, the NBA Board of Governors unanimously voted to pass new penalties on tempering. “We sent the following memo to the L.A. Lake--- I mean all thirty teams,” Adam Silver began his press conference. “Any team found to have improperly contacted a player will have one first round pick revoked and the removal of their Plumlee brother,” Silver read while dressed like a biker gang member. This uncharacteristically harsh punishment from Silver is largely being seen ...

by admin January 18, 2020

NBA News , Officiating , Raptors , Thunder , Wizards

NBA Reminds Players: “Absolutely NO Going Into the Stands Unless Someone Says Something That Hurts Your Feelings”

A strongly worded letter has gone out to all 30 teams reminding each coaching staff that there will be absolutely zero tolerance for players entering the stands unless some fan says something that hurts their feelings. Following games where both Isaiah Thomas and Kyle Lowry went into the stands to confront fans, Commissioner Adam Silver appeared on The Jump to speak on the matter. “You know, sometimes I can be a rude cuss but when I say ‘zero tolerance’, I mean ...

by admin January 18, 2020

Knicks , NBA News , Suns

NBA to Cater to Millennials by Changing Phrase ‘Tie Game’ to ‘Twinsies!’

The NBA is leaving no stone unturned in its efforts to stop its ratings problem. Critics have implored the NBA to turn the ratings tide by addressing tough issues such as “load management” and the all-stars scheming to consolidate their talent on superteams. But the NBA has decided instead to double-down on their desire to win over the nation’s millennials by updating the phrase “tie game” to the more hip “twinsies!” During last week’s Suns / Knicks game, Mike Breen used ...

by admin January 18, 2020

Mavericks , NBA News , Thunder

Guys Who Change Dallas’ NHL Floor to NBA Court Out Due to Load Management

DALLAS, TX-- The guys who change the NHL ice to the NBA court were held out of Monday’s floor shift due to load management. Herb Clifton, American Airlines Center’s operations manager, alerted the Mavericks that because it’s a long season he believed it was wise to rest his key floor changers. “These decisions are never popular,” said Herb. “But ultimately I think the fans would much rather attend a playoff game with a fully assembled court than a random regular ...

by admin January 15, 2020

Lakers , Old School , Thunder

NBA to Honor David Stern’s Final Wishes

According to loved ones by David Stern’s bedside, the former NBA Commissioner's final request was, “Whatever happens, never let the Lakers get Chris Paul.” “I said, ‘of course, David,’” Adam Silver recounted. “Even if the Thunder put together a totally appropriate package which brings them both young prospects and draft picks, we’ll squash it.” “One more thing,” Stern whispered, “Make sure to enforce that dress code. And grow your damn hair out ...

by admin January 9, 2020

NBA News , Nets , Warriors

Bob Myers Clears Kevin Durant for Full Contact

Earlier this week, Warriors General Manager Bob Myers called up the Brooklyn Nets and gave Kevin Durant the green light for full 5-on-5 workouts. Meyer’s call was soon on speakerphone as he gave the news to the Brooklyn Nets training staff. “Yep. I think we’re all set. Roll Kevin out there. Today,” he said sternly. Both the Nets and Durant’s doctors were determined to have the injured forward out for the entire season, but that was until Meyers began his world ...