all flopping on all shots

Adam Silver Dreams of a Day Where NBA Players Flop on Every Possession

Perhaps the only thing more graceful than a world-class NBA athlete rising up and swishing a 25-foot three-pointer is watching that same shooter jerk his head back, flailing his arms and screaming the F-word at the officials.

NBA fans can appreciate that Adam Silver knows this better than anyone and he is working hard to give fans what they want.

When the Commissioner was asked about the huge increase of call-seeking behavior from shooters, Silver took a victory lap.

“Oh yes, it’s incredible. Just fantastic,” the Commissioner began.  “We certainly don’t want to set unrealistic goals for our fans, but I do envision a league where, one day, 100% of shots are accompanied by some type of flop.”

Silver, the international basketball leagues, and the NCAA are working towards an understanding that moving forward, a properly attempted field goal should include some type of gyration and a bewildered look at an official. 

The press conference concluded with an excited ESPN reporter giving Adam Silver a high-five for the great news.  Silver crumbled to the floor grabbing his hand and began rolling on the carpet screaming obscenities. It was later learned this was merely a demonstration from Silver as to what NBA fans can soon expect on every possession.

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