Alex Caruso to Laker teammates: ‘Stop asking me to do your taxes’

Alex Caruso to Laker teammates: ‘Stop asking me to do your taxes’

Life for an NBA role player can be difficult.  Just ask balding Lakers guard Alex Caruso.  Reports are the third-year guard is being routinely asked by teammates to look over their taxes and it’s been effecting his on-court development.  Caruso has no professional accounting skills, but his teammates do not seem to understand that.  Take this exchange in a recent practice for example:

“Hey, Kuzma!  If your man leaves you to double me, sprint to the rim, I’ll find you!” LeBron yelled during the scrimmage.  “And Alex, what I need you to do is tell me how I should file my income for the games played in Florida!” 

“Gosh darn it, LeBron!” Caruso hollered back.  “I told you, a simple 1040 form would work—but can you please give me the same instructions as you give the other players?”

“For sure, Alex!  Just—real quick, I talked a lot about Black Lives Matter yesterday.  Is that considered a charitable contribution!?” LeBron shouted while pushing the ball up the floor.

“No!  That’s enough!  And put your hand down JR Smith!” Caruso yelled towards the bench.  “You don’t even pay taxes!”

“Yeah, I wanna know if that’s a problem or nah!” Smith shot back.  

After the next dead ball, Laker coach Frank Vogel took Caruso out.  He sat the young guard on the bench and slowly pointed to his watch. 

“I know, I know coach.  Now’s our time.  And we’ve got to stay focused,” he said feeling badly for snapping at his teammates. 

“Uhh.  Yeah.  Absolutely.  Now’s our time for sure,” an uneasy Vogel said.  “It’s just… Do you know if I can write off the cost of this watch?  It’s sort of part of my work attire.  Awe, don’t leave!  Come back, Alex!”   

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