A determined Marcus Smart studies film of wavy arm inflatable guys before big game
Marcus Smart is not leaving anything to chance before the Celtics big game versus the Miami Heat tonight. Per his request, team video coordinators have compiled ten hours of those big wavy arm inflatable guys to better prepare the shooting guard for battle.
“I’m a tough guy. Someone who’s willing to fall down on any given play. You wrote down that I’m tough, right?” Smart asked the media. “Coach Stevens wants us to do anything for a win. But I’ll do coach one better. I’ll do anything for a flop. But he gets really mad when I say that.”
Smart even offered to share the invaluable skills he learned with some media members. “Check this move out. This is the late Floppy McFlailly. A 21-foot legend from Tampa Bay Chevrolet. Watch him fall down,” he said, pausing the film. “But then look. BOOM! He pops back up, straight as an arrow! I’m going to add that to my bag for sure. Fall down, wait for the ref to panic and call a flagrant, and once he does, pop right up like ol’ McFlailly.”
ESPN’s Jackie MacMullan, so impressed by the Celtics guard’s brilliance, immediately blacked out, forcing the trainers to resuscitate her again.
After awakening, MacMullan whispered, “Who raised me from the dead? It was Tony Allen, wasn’t it? I haven’t been this awe-struck by a Celtic since KG once called me a ‘mother ****ing dumb*** phony s***face.’”
The film has apparently helped Smart, who was able to draw 31 fouls in the first quarter. “What do you want from me? He fell down!” a referee yelled at a furious Eric Spoelstra. “What on earth could have happened other than a foul!” a referee yelled.
Update: James Harden is now suing Marcus Smart, claiming that footage of the wavy arm inflatable guys was his property.