NBA forced to remind players that marijuana testing ended three years ago

After NBA players celebrated that the league would no longer test for weed, an annoyed Adam Silver was forced to remind them that the league had ended weed testing over three seasons ago.

“Awe, hell yeah!  This year gonna be LIT!!!” Iman Shumpert tweeted. 

J.R. Smith called his agent and yelled, “Looks like I’ll be going green next season!” and then laughed for 18 minutes before learning he had called an Arby’s. 

Finally, for the third consecutive year, Adam Silver was forced to comment. 

“How many times have we been over this?” Silver asked.  “Every few months, this story pops up, and all the players act like it’s fresh information.  Why do they keep forgetting?  I was told that if we raised the player’s salaries 200%, we would get a 200% increase in responsibility.”

Adam Silver’s policy of ending marijuana testing came about after a detailed and sophisticated memo from the players’ union in 2017. 

“We told Adam we’d call him a racist if they didn’t stop testing for weed,” Chris Paul explained. 

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